Crash (2005)Dir: Paul Haggis
Starring: Don Cheadle, Matt Dillon, Jennifer Esposito, Thandie Newton, Sandra Bullock, Brendan Fraser, Ludicrous, Ryan Phillippe, Terrence Howard, Larenz Tate, William Fichtner, etc
IMDB: 8.5 (#59 on Top 250 of All-Time)
A good film, that gets a lot of props as "Best Film of the Year." Director Haggis is a veteran Hollywood writer, Oscar nominated for Million Dollar Baby. Crash is a study on racism, fear, aggression, and a lack of communication using multiple intersecting stoylines and characters, set in Los Angeles. There's the racist cop with a new partner harrassing rich black people, whose lives are thrown in turmoil by the incident. There's the street thugs who talk about not getting a fair shack in this world because of racism, then they car-jack someone, who happens to be the D.A. of L.A., whose wife is tramatized into paranoia by the incident. There's the Persian grocery store owner who's business is vandelized and so he tries to take revenge on the Latino locksmith that couldn't fix his broken door. And there's the black cop who's being used by his department as a figurehead of tolerence in a racist P.D., while dealing with a delinquint brother and an mother with Alzheimiers. It's a dense story because of the sheer size of the cast, but it moves fast, by really only focusing on aspects of the characters lives that pertain to their themes. There are some powerful scenes, most notably the scene where the locksmith and his child are confronted by the gun-wielding store-owner. This is probably the best shot, paced, written and most gut-wrenching scene from a film that I have ever seen. It is powerful and this movie should be seen for that moment alone, but the rest of Crash won't disappoint. My major complaint is that it's over too soon, and I wanted nmore from these characters. This would have made a great 5- hour mini-series. As it is, you get a lot of bang for your buck from this drama.
The Sneaky Cheetah's Grade: A
Kingdom of Heaven (2005)Dir: Ridley Scott
Staring: Orlando Bloom, Liam Neeson, Eva Green, Jeremy Irons, David Thewlis, Brendan Gleeson, Edward Norton
IMDB: 6.9
A beatiful period piece, which scores on many levels, but is downright boring on others. The story is mostly set in Jerusalem, occupied for many years by European christians and currently led by Baldwin, the Leper King (Edward Norton under the mask!). The land is protected by knights like Sir Godfrey (Neeson), who journeys back to Europe to contact a son he's never known, a blacksmith named Balian (Bloom). Balian rejects Godfrey's offer to return with him to Jerusalem, but after killing a thieving priest, runs after daddy for protection from the law. Godfrey is mortally wounded soon after and Balian becomes the heir to his holdings and title. Balian is soon engulfed by the intrigues of the King's court in Jerusalem, as he is befriended by the King and Sir Tiberius (Irons), sleeps with the King's married sister Sibyllia (Green) and pisses off the apparent King-to-be Guy de Lusignan. The entire film so far is kind of boring and kind of stupid. Bloom sleepwalks through it, showing no emotion and barely offering any dialog, just sort of going frompoint A to B to C. There's a few small battles and they are well done.
But about this time, the film kicks into gear. King Baldwin dies and bad-guy Guy de Lusignan becomes the new King. He foolishly leads Jerusalem's army out to attack the Arab forces, led by the famous general Saladin. They are decinmated and all that stands between the Arabs re-taking Jerusalem are few knights led by Balian. What follows is an epic siege, which borrows heavily from the battle of the Pelinor Fields in Lord of the Rings: Return of the King. Heaven's battle is probably the 2nd best of all time (after RotK) and the films hits a new level of awesomness that wasn't even hinted at by the slow grind of the first half of the film.
Another great thing about Kingdom of Heaven is the costumes. How many films make you look up and say, "Damn, those are the sweetest medieval costumes and props I've ever seen!"? That plus the cinematography make this the most visually impressive film I've seen in 2005. Ridley Scott (Alien, Gladiator) is still the master at big intense blockbuster films. I hope there's some Oscars for that in Kingdom of Heaven's future. On the scale of recent historical epics, this is just under Troy, but above King Arthur and miles above Alexander.
The Sneaky Cheetah's Grade: B
Elf (2003)Dir: John Favreau
Starring: Will Ferrell, James Cann, Bob Newhart, Edward Asner, Zooey Deschanel, Faizon Love, Andy Richter, Kyle Gass
IMDB: 7.0
Elf is pretty good. It's not great, but could become a Christma classic on the strength of the uncomplicated story, earnest performances, and a feel good ending. Ferrell is his usual manic self as Buddy, a human raised by elves in the North Pole. He relizes he doesn't fit in (sound like another wayward elf story you know?...an elf named HERMIE! perhaps?), so he journey's to New York to find his real dad, who never knew he was born. Dad (Cann) is a workaholic children's book publisher who doesn't have time for the family he's got, much less the strange addition of Buddy. The rest is basicly a fish-out-of-water story as Buddy comes to grips with New York living. Zooey Deschanel is adourable as Jovi, misfit department store clerk with a good signing voice who somehow starts to date Buddy. After this and The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, Zooey is fast becoming one of my favorite actresses. All this adds up to good stuf, and there's some hillarious midget humor, and who doesn't like midgets, eh?!? The soundtrack is also a solid Christmas album, and yall know how much I love Christmas Music!
The Sneaky Cheetah's Grade: B
p.s. Here's a bonus pic featuring that midget!
Kicking and Screaming (2005)
Dir: Jesse Dylan
Starring: Will Ferrell, Robert Duvall, Mike Ditka, Kate Walsh
IMDB: 5.4
This movie sucks. There are a few laughs, but they fade quickly, and unlike Elf, Ferrell's antics seem forced and kind of sad. Also there are stupid plot lines, like Ferrell becomes addicted to coffee??? and starts behaving violently to the kids, it just left me with a bad taste in my mouth.This movie could have been about the kids, the soccer team, but they barely get screen-time. It's Farrell's bomb all the way. I won't say any more, because that's like pooping on poop.
The Sneaky Cheetah's Grade: F
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